Farther Away
by Lady Sunlight
Summary: She knew it was wrong to love him but why did it feel so right? -------------------- My first HrD Fic!
1. Farther Away

Farther Away:  
  
Summary: Hermione has done everything in her power to get Harry, but once she has him she starts seeing someone else in a new light......  
  
~*~*~  
  
I took their smiles and I made them mine.  
  
I sold my soul just to hide the light.  
  
And now I see what I really am,  
  
A thief a whore, and a liar.  
  
~*~*~  
  
There he stood. I watched Harry laugh with his newest girlfriend, Paravati. They were laughing at something. Laughing at me. I knew that's what it had to be. I knew they all hated me; they probably knew what I did. I knew I couldn't let Harry stay with her any longer. I had to end this relationship also. I needed to know how though. I had already used so many ways. Dammit Harry why do you have to be so beautiful? I felt tears fall down my face. I wiped tem up. No I can't show any weakness I must be strong or Harry won't want me.  
  
"Hermione," Ron came up behind me. "What's the matter?" What's the matter Ron? My true love is with that stupid bitch Paravati. But I couldn't say that or it might raise suspicion.  
  
"Nothing is wrong, why do you ask Ron?" I turned to face him, his face held worry and concern.  
  
"Because you're right palm is bleeding." He said softly looking into my eyes. I had to turn away and looked at my right hand. I had dug my nails into my palm and it was now bleeding.  
  
"Oh well I was thinking about school and I guessed I never realized." This was a lie. I don't think he believed it. He didn't push the topic though.  
  
"Well I have to go see you later." He walked of muttering something shaking his head.  
  
~*~*~  
  
I run to you,  
  
Call out your name,  
  
I see you there, farther away  
  
~*~*~  
  
I wanted to go talk to Harry but he was busy talking to Paravati, I had to think of a plan. I decided to go to my room where I could be in peace. I dashed up the stairs taking them two at a time. I couldn't afford to take my time, I had to break them up and fast. I went into my room; I had my own seeing I was head girl. I turned to my wall closest to the door. I had a wall of all the girls in our year, Cho and Ginny. I had a great portion of them crossed off. Cho was the easiest to get rid of. I just told her that she should talk to Harry about Cedric considering he was there. Others I had lied to ensuring that they wouldn't tell Harry. They had all worked out so far. I had to dispose of Paravati, but how? I could always tell her Ron liked her, everyone knew she liked him. Well I was fresh out of ideas so I decided to use it, besides then Ron could leave me alone.  
  
I took my time when leaving downstairs because I knew I might encounter Paravati on her way to get ready for a date with Harry. MY Harry. As I thought I saw her going upstairs, alone.  
  
"Paravati, can I tell you something?" I asked trying to sound as innocent as possible.  
  
"Yeah, of course Hermione anything." Paravati walked up to me trying to keep up with my quick long strides. "Can you make it quick? I have a date with Harry."  
  
"Oh yes of course that..." I drifted off.  
  
"Hermione what's the matter?" She's trying to sound concerned but I know she just wants to get rid of me.  
  
"You know Ron Weasley?" I asked as if she didn't know who he could be.  
  
"Uh yeah, of course." I saw her start to blush, it was sickening. "What about him?"  
  
"Well, how do I put this? He told me he really has a BIG crush on you." I empathized on the word big.  
  
I saw her face light up and a smile crossed across her face. This was actually going to work.  
  
"Well he asked me to tell you he wants to go out with you and I'm supposed to send an answer so if you could give me one." I think she was trapped thinking about herself. She is so selfish.  
  
"Oh uh tell him I'll meet him in The Three Broomsticks. I have to talk to Harry." She ran down the stairs like she was on fire.  
  
'Now where would Ron be...?' I thought to myself. But to my luck Ron came running down the stairs at the precise moment.  
  
"Ron!" I yelled. I acted quickly and jammed my foot into the trick stair. I don't know why but I panicked. It's not like someone goes up to their best friend 'Hi can you go out with Paravati and break her and Harry up? Pretty please?' You just don't do that. Oh crap he turned around and here I am staring into space. "Uh can you help me?" It was pathetic but it worked. He ran to me eager to help.  
  
"How did you get stuck in here?" He asked trying to pull me out.  
  
"I was thinking about what Paravati said." I wanted to leave him wanting more.  
  
"What did she say?" He stood up and looked into my eyes like he was pleading for me to tell him want he wanted to hear.  
  
"Well she just said that she wanted to go out with you sometime, so want to go get lunch?" I tried to sound as casual as possible.  
  
"Whoa back up there Hermione. What did Paravati say?" He looked so excited just like Paravati was. This was going to work perfectly.  
  
~*~*~  
  
I'm numb to you - numb and deaf and blind.  
  
You give me all but the reason why.  
  
I reach but I feel only air at night.  
  
Not you, not love, just nothing.  
  
I run to you,  
  
Call out your name,  
  
I see you there, farther away.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Paravati said she would meet you at The Three Broomsticks if you accept." He was about to run of to her but he stopped and looked at me.  
  
"Hermione I thought Harry and Paravati were dating?" I had anticipated this and had already thought of a reply.  
  
"They broke up because Harry's interests changed."  
  
"But wouldn't Harry tell me first?" God doesn't this boy ever shut up?  
  
"He thought he would surprise you." He ran off before I could even say 'you'.  
  
Now that Paravati was gone I could cross off her picture. There were only three girls left in our year. I had already gotten rid of Ginny. I remember it like it was yesterday.  
  
****** One Year Earlier ******  
  
"Yeah Lavender, Harry told me he was going to break up with Ginny." I spoke my words loud enough for Ginny who was near-by to hear without raising suspicion that I was purposely doing it. I saw Ginny come closer to me.  
  
"Hermione what do you mean Harry wants to break up with me?" She looked like she was going to cry. Stupid weak little girl.  
  
"I'm sorry Ginny; I tried to talk him out of it." My voice sounded rather convincing. "He wouldn't hear reason though, something about you being too young." I put my arm around he shoulder. "It'll be okay you're very pretty." I knew I had her then.  
  
"You think?" She looked up at me her checks tear-stained. "I'll miss him."  
  
"Why don't you get back at him and break up with him first? You know to teach him a lesson." She looked at me I saw a glint in her eyes.  
  
"Y-your right Hermione I should." She said through her sobs. "After dinner I'll take him on a walk and we'll see who breaks up with who."  
  
"Actually it's who will break up with whom Ginny." She started giggling and I joined in just to seem sincere.  
  
***** End Flashback*****  
  
Ginny had broken up with Harry that night, he was crushed. But I was there to console him. I had almost had him but Lavender stole him away just 2 months later. I couldn't even remember how I had broken those two up. It didn't matter that was in the past, all I knew was I am so close to having Harry as my own. Tonight I'll tell him how I feel, he won't be able to resist.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Try to forget you,  
  
But without you I feel nothing.  
  
Don't leave me here, by myself.  
  
I can't breathe.  
  
I run to you,  
  
Call out your name,  
  
I see you there, farther away.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Harry are you okay?" Harry had his head hanging down; he looked sort of depressed I knew it was my fault but I didn't care as long as he became mine.  
  
"I just can't believe Paravati broke up with me, you know? I thought we were happy." He looked into my eyes. Dear god I wanted him. He was so gorgeous with his pools of green emeralds for eyes. His silky mat of black hair.  
  
"I know Harry I can't believe she would do that to you. I thought she loved you. I guess I was wrong." I turned away to make him think I was crying. That was the money-maker he grabbed my shoulder.  
  
"Hermione? What's the matter, why are you crying?" He turned me around to face him.  
  
"Oh Harry I just feel so stupid! I was wrong about you and Paravati and I feel so stressed out about school. I feel so idiotic." I let more tears stream down my face but wiped them up. Why do I cry I wasn't planning to why do these tears come? I'm not sad I broke them up. Is Harry what I really want? Of course he is! I'm being silly. "Oh Harry I love you!" I embraced him in a kiss; he was reluctant at first but then accepted me.  
  
"I love you so much Hermione." I knew I was just a rebound from Paravati but that didn't matter to me, I just wanted him so much. At last he was mine. Those eyes were mine, that hair, his lustrous blonde hair. Blonde hair?! I meant black I swear! I love his steel grey eyes. Dammit! I did it again! I meant green! I was just thinking about how much I hate Draco Malfoy yes that's it. I love Harry not Malfoy, Harry. In fact I hate Malfoy. I finally have what I want.  
  
But why do I feel so incomplete?  
  
~*~*~  
  
I run to you,  
  
Call out your name,  
  
I see you there, farther away,  
  
Farther away,  
  
farther away,  
  
farther away,  
  
farther away,  
  
farther away.  
  
~*~*~  
  
AN: And that's the first chapter! Well I know Hermione is very occ but I need her to be like that for this to work. Okay? Okay.  
  
I'll have the next chapter up when I get FIVE reviews. 


	2. Forever Gone, Forever You

Farther Away:  
  
Forever Gone, Forever You:  
  
~*~*~  
  
I wanted you to be with me  
  
For so long I don't even know why now  
  
But now that I've given up on you  
  
Defiantly you see me  
  
~*~*~  
  
Here I am standing at a Harry's game against Slytherin. All this hard work to get him and now that I have him I can't remember why I wanted him in the first place. Is he really what I wanted at all?  
  
"Gryffindor wins!" Lee Jordon yelled. We won. I looked at the grass below the stadium and saw Draco walking across the grass his shoulders slouched. For some reason I wanted to go out there and hug him and tell him it would be ok.  
  
What was I thinking!? This is Draco Malfoy! I'm supposed to hate him! He's a cruel hateful soul. I can't even think about loving him. Oh my god!? Did I just use the word love in the same sentence as Draco Malfoy? What's wrong with me? I know what it is! I'm just not used to having Harry as a boyfriend so my mind is messing up. That's it I know it.  
  
I have to find Harry before I go out of my mind. I raced out of the stands to where Harry was standing being congratulated by team mates.  
  
"Harry you were great!" I screamed and ran into his open arms; a cold shiver ran over my body. I let out a gasp.  
  
"Hermione what's wrong?" He looked in my eyes, the stadium lights reflected in his eyes.  
  
"Nothing I'm just tired I'm going to bed you have fun with everyone else." I reluctantly kissed him on the check and walked away. After I was out of sight I ran straight for the castle but ended up running into a wall of bodies. Well actually only one, Draco Malfoy.  
  
"Well what do I have here?" He circled around me looking at me, I had to turn my head around to keep track of where he was.  
  
"What do you want Draco?" I clamped my hand to my mouth. I had actually called him by his first name.  
  
"I'm just wondering why you would be walking alone without your Potter and Weasley." He sneered at me.  
  
"Were not attached at the hip you know." I started to walk away and get away from this creep. But he is a handsome creep. God I need a doctor.  
  
"Well I'll walk you to the castle then I was heading there anyway." He ran to my side.  
  
"Your, being nice to me?"  
  
"Well I have nothing better to do with my time so I might as well do this so you're not alone."  
  
"Well thank you."  
  
We walked in silence the rest of the way occasionally saying "soooo......" before I knew it we were at the staircase.  
  
"Well bye and thank you for walking me."  
  
"Your welcome." Then he did something so un-Draco Malfoy I was scared. He kissed me on the cheek! "Bye Hermione see you around!" He ran off in the other direction.  
  
I raised my hand to my cheek and could still feel his soft smooth lips on my cheek. His short kiss on my cheek was better then any kiss I had gotten from Harry. But Harry was my boyfriend I was supposed to get all tingly when he kissed me not Draco Malfoy the man I am supposed to hate! What's wrong with me!?  
  
~*~*~  
  
Walking away I see the pain  
  
You put me through  
  
Lost in your game to change the same  
  
Forever gone, forever you  
  
~*~*~  
  
I got up the stairs got in the Gryffindor common room climbed the stairs to my head girl room and plopped myself on my bed. God I love that Draco Malfoy.  
  
I slept the whole night peacefully until I was woken up by the birds outside.  
  
"I am so glad its Saturday." I said aloud to myself. I looked across the room from my bed and saw my bare wall. I had taken down all the pictures awhile ago. That night I had gotten Harry. Just then I remembered last night. "Oh god he kissed me!" But it was so good. I actually sort of miss him. I wish he would kiss me again. Aug! I did it again! Why did I say that? I love HARRY not Draco Harry! I need to get breakfast.  
  
I finally got out of bed got dressed. I quickly put a calming spell on my hair so it wouldn't be quite so bad. I still don't wear makeup unlike the other girls, even Ginny does. I ran down the stairs and saw Harry in the common room. I ran up to him and quickly said hi kissing him on the cheek.  
  
"Want to go get something to eat?" I asked him looking up considering he was 3 inches taller than me.  
  
"Yeah sure I was waiting for you." He smiled down at me, making me feel guilty for going with Draco, even if for only a short time, last night.  
  
We walked down the stairs and he asked me how I felt because I didn't look so good last night. I told him I was fine and we walked in silence the rest of the way. When we entered the great hall I saw Draco at the Slytherin table eating and talking with his friends. I felt my heart longing for him, to touch him and kiss him and have him hold me. I wanted his lips again. But I was with Harry; I looked up at him and smiled. We sat down at the nearest table by Ron and Paravati. I saw Harry not looking directly at Paravati avoiding her gaze.  
  
"What do you think Hermione?" I looked up and saw all three of them staring at me.  
  
"What was the question?" I saw them all shake their heads.  
  
"Never mind." Ron said turning back to the rest of them.  
  
~*~*~  
  
There's something very wrong about this  
  
I think you knew all along somehow  
  
You'll only take me to change my mind  
  
And leave me broken and defeated  
  
~*~*~  
  
I stood up and told them I had homework to do and would see them later. I saw Draco start to step into the hall and ran quickly towards the door he left through. I caught up to him and saw him glare.  
  
"What do you want?" He sneered at me. Why was he being like his he was perfectly nice yesterday. I saw Crabe and Goyle lumbering towards us and it dawned on me. I would ruin his reputation. Draco sort of shoved me not to hard and I felt a piece of paper fall into my hand and I stuffed it quickly into my pocket.  
  
"I wanted to tell you Snape saw you making out with a girl and is pissed." I don't even know why I said it but I did. I wish I didn't though because those brutes stumbled over to Draco and started asking him all these questions about whom it was and where. I saw Draco look at me with a glare. I mouthed sorry to him and turned the other way. I ran around the corner, dug into my pocket and retrieved the piece of paper he handed me.  
  
Meet me at the lake by the big willow tree at 12:00 PM.  
  
I re-read it because I couldn't believe that Draco Malfoy and I might start to have an affair. This was so unreal I couldn't believe it. I mean me and Draco Malfoy!? Who would have thought? But I remember his soft gentle lips and it all goes away and all I want is him. It's not like Harry is all that great of a boyfriend. He's sort of neglectful and he always talks about sports. Even if I was dating Draco it's not like I would tell Harry because then people would begin to hate me and shun me and I couldn't take that.  
  
~*~*~  
  
So far away I see the truth  
  
I see through you  
  
Now that I know the way you play  
  
I don't want to  
  
~*~*~  
  
I had Harry's invisibility cloak wrapped around me. I had borrowed saying I wanted to study in the library, he wanted to come but I told him that he would distract me. Now I was waiting by the lake for Draco. What if he didn't come? What if he was up in the castle laughing it up with- My thoughts were cut out by someone putting their hand on my shoulder.  
  
"Ahh!" I let out a scream before having a hand clamped around my mouth. I turned around and saw Draco's smirking face. "Oh god you scared me."  
  
"I gathered that." He looked into my eyes, hazel into steel.  
  
"So you wanted to see me." I broke the silence.  
  
"I just wanted to uh say hi." He looked at the ground keeping his eyes on a worm that had popped out of the ground.  
  
I lifted his head up with my hand and looked into his eyes.  
  
"That's not all you came here for and I know it." He looked at me and I knew he had something he wanted to tell me. I didn't care I just kissed him. It was better than I remembered it. His hands ran down from my head to my waist bringing me closer to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck. We separated and just stood there and I rested my head on his shoulder. We stood there for a long time although it seemed like minutes to us, listening to each others breathing. Owls hooted in the distance. I looked out on the lake watching the moon shimmer over the water like little diamonds that sat on the surface.  
  
"Hermione?" Draco spoke, I looked up at his face. I heard a sound in the distance. It was probably just a creature from the forest but I couldn't take any chances.  
  
"Draco we have to go back!" I yelled turning away from him and running like I was on fire. We ran together not looking back. We finally reached the stairs where he had kissed me the night before and quickly said goodnight. We both ran in the direction of our common rooms. I reached my bed and fell asleep instantly.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Walking away I see the pain  
  
You put me through  
  
Lost in your game to change the same  
  
Forever gone, forever you  
  
~*~*~  
  
I had the best sleep ever that night. I woke up so cheerful I scared even myself. But it didn't last for long. When I reached the common room I saw Harry sitting in his favorite chair. I went over to say hi but couldn't bring myself to kiss him, I just didn't love him anymore.  
  
"Hello Hermione did you sleep okay?" He asked me looking into my eyes soulfully.  
  
"Umm yeah why do you ask?"  
  
"Well I tried waiting up for you but gave up at one o' clock. You must have been at the library for a long time.  
  
"Oh yes but I slept well all the same." I turned away from his piercing gaze to examine my nails. Ginny walked up to me.  
  
"Hermione may I speak to you? Privately" She looked down at me. But waved quickly to Harry, I followed her across the room in a corner where no one would overhear us.  
  
"What's up Ginny?"  
  
"I saw you yesterday Hermione with Malfoy."  
  
AN: I've always wanted to use a cliffy. More romancing will come up soon..... 


End file.
